Second Miscarriage - December 2015

This is the first of three Christmas Miscarriages....

We go in to our 8 week ultrasound so excited!  I've been feeling pretty good, tired but good!  We sit anxiously in the waiting room to be called back for our first ever ultrasound.  We go in, I lay down and the ultrasound starts.  After  a few minutes the tech looks at us and says "This is the reason why sometimes I hate my job".  Theres a sac, but there's no baby.  No fetal pole (I had no idea what in the heck that was) No heartbeat. No baby.  Total and complete devastation.  I was told it was a Blighted Ovum. Umm, what next?  D&C.  Surgery.  Wait, there's no chance for a baby to possibly grow?  No, surgery 5 days before Christmas.  That's your option.  So 5 days before Christmas I cried and wept and we had the D&C.  It was awful.  Not that the act of what happening was bad enough, but I endured the aftermath for 6 weeks after.  No one told me that I was going to be constantly reminded of that miscarriage every second for 6 weeks....

Not what you want.

This was the point where this became not only a goal but an absolute.  I was going to have a baby. It didn't matter what I had to do.  I risked my marriage, my social life. I was going to make sure we were trying on all of the right days.  Didn't that take then fun out of everything....